I am still here

It’s been pretty crazy the past few weeks. After the show two weeks ago, I had a major panic attack and now I’m getting divorced. I’ve been trying to lay low and make sure I’m taking care of myself, not been too successful on the second part of that.

I got to spend some time with my kids today, something I never took for granted. We spent a few hours at Free Play and had lunch together before they went to check out their new living situation. Life is full of the things you don’t plan for and I can only hope that the future holds happiness on some level for all of us.

I’ll be ok. I have to believe that. I’m really fragile right now and trying to give myself the necessary time to process and heal and try to plan for the future.

My friends took me out climbing today, it was a nice distraction but my mind kept going back to where I’m at right now. Looking at routes and thinking about my kids. Shaking out my hands and then thinking about the future. I’m staying at my other friend’s house for the rest of the summer and then I’ll be in my own place for the first time since 2003. It’s pretty surreal.

If you see me walking around looking lost, you know why. Feel free to say something because I probably won’t.